Application
Senshi: Sailor Hades, Olympian Senshi of the Spirits
Name: Demonia Drakevolare (last name is the combination of the greek word for dragon latin words for fly)
Meaning: female demon of the dragonflies
Age: 22
Birthdate: October 31st
School/Occupation: Freelance Scenery Photographer
Major NPCs: Her mother and father are hardly around and most people make fun of her, she has yet to make any friends.
History
She was born in Greece on October 31st and a full moon was shining brightly into the hospital room, most people in the hospital were superstitious and said that everything lined up to perfectly and that she would be a curse upon anyone around her. From a young age her appearance made her different, her lavender eye scared other children and her long black ravened hair always got pulled on, she had so many problems with other children that she was home schooled and she never left her house. When she was ten her parents and her moved to America into a city that she was told is called New York.
Nothing much had happened in her first year of living there, she lives in what is Upper East Side of New York. Her parents took up a traveling job and so that they wouldn’t have to take her everywhere with them they hired a nanny to take care of her when they were gone, the nanny was never kind to her, she was always called a freak and forced to wear contacts so that the nanny didn’t get creeped out by the lavender color of her eyes, she cried to her parents every time they came home to try to find a new nanny for her but they never listened. She started to look into private schools that she could enroll in so that she could get out of the house, while researching schools she found Drake Preparatory School and the next time she saw her parents she convinced them to enroll her.
She enjoyed school more than home, the teasing of other kids didn’t bother her anymore since she was engrossed into her school work, she was most happy for it since she would no longer have to wear contacts and she didn’t mind the uniforms too much, when she was fifteen some of the boys started to pull on her hair and call her names, this was the first time in a long time that she was really getting teased. Her anger started to grow and as it did a power swept over her and the boys fell to the ground in pain, a crow had swooped down and landed on her shoulder and started to talk to her, she had become so upset that she had ran off of school property and took a bus and walked the rest of the way to the nearest forest, when she looked around the crow perched on her shoulder again and told Demonia that she was Sailor Hades the guardian of death, the crow introduced herself as Morgan her partner that is to train her on how to be a sailor guardian, Demonia slowly excepted this fact but she also learned that there were other like her and she loved the idea of causing them all misery and suffering once she finds them and knows who they are.
Demonia graduated with all A’s and even though she had many scholarships to colleges that would have taken her in and allow her to stay in the dorms she turned them all down except one that was to School of Visual Arts. There she learned about photography and was really good at capturing the beauty in nature even if to other the photos that she took were morbid and depressing, her teachers always loved her photos and when she was praised for how good they were it always brought a smile to her face, when she graduated she had A’s and B’s but it didn’t bother her, her choice of college course made her feel alive and happy for once in her life.
Demonia now spends most her time outdoors trying to find places that she hadn’t taken photos of yet and trying to get the right light for her picture perfect moment, she isn’t bothered by how little her parents are home and she finally has a friend named Morgan, a pet crow that she talks to whenever she is out and about and Morgan always listens and talks back if she has something to say on the matter that they are discussing.
Personality
She is very much to herself and doesn’t know how to interact with others since she has never had a friend that she could talk to, deep down she is nice and kind but the years of loneliness had made her wary and cautious of everyone around her. Quirk - She has and elegant air to her but instead of looking as though she thinks she is better than everyone around her she looks as though she is being herself and not fake or standoffish, if you ever run into her on the streets you might see her giving to the homeless, they seem to be the only people that will accept her, she gives them food, clothing, and money whenever she isn’t busy.
Her motivation is to find the other scouts and cause them pain if she can and find her place in the world but she is also motivated by the idea that maybe one day she will have friends that she can protect and that will protect her.
In her free time she likes to take scenery photos and then sell them, she writes poetry and goes to a lot of the jazz clubs, she goes to the poets corner when they have open mic night and she pick a poem that she had been working on and tells anyone that will listen. In her future she would like to find a guy who will accept her for how she looks and her personality, she wants to settle down with him and start a family.
She dislikes bright lively colors since the people who normally wear them are or seem to be happy, she hates people who seem to be fakes and cares for no one but themselves even when it is family matter related, she loves to go the harbor and ride the ferry and take photos of the city while out on the water. She loves winter, she takes all her best photos during that time and she goes loves to go ice skating in the park, her best memory happened there, she was dancing alone on the ice and a young man asked if he could join her, they danced to the music that was playing and he told her that she had beautiful eyes and her hair reminded him of a flock of ravens. She never saw the man again unless it is in her dreams where her world is her own.
Appearance
What does your character look like? Raven black Hair, lavender eyes, she has a smooth unblemished face with pale pink lips and a small beauty mark next to her nose on the left side of her face, she is 5’6”, 125 pounds, she has a curvaceous body, her most distinguishing features are her eyes and hair and her porcelain looking skin; also on her right shoulder blade she has a birth mark in the shape of a two pronged spear (popular symbol of hades), and she prefers to wear dresses and skirts she loves to wear anything that will make her look elegant.
Transformation
“I call forth the deadly and powerful Hades of the Underworld.” As she starts to go through her transformation a funnel of dark and tortured souls would surround has they rip her clothing away and form a short, black tunic onto her and as it ends there would be a form standing behind her in all black robes and then vanishes soon after. Her relic would be a black shroud.
Powers
Her weapon is her relic that is a black shroud, if she has the chance the wrap it around someone just once then it will slowly encase the victim and constrict them until they either die or Demonia pulls it off of them. Her power ability is to summon the souls of the dead to attack anyone she wants.
Guardian
Morgan (Celtic goddess name, if this does not work then I will choose another. I just liked the name Morgan so I used it) is Demonia’s guardian and only friend; she is a raven that has always been there for Demonia even if she doesn’t know it. Morgan looks just like any other raven but the seemingly gold ring on her head as if she was wearing a tiara of some sort was the only thing that was different about her. Morgan is a caring and loving guardian, when she first came to Demonia’s aid and told Demonia who she was Demonia would start to freak out whenever she saw Morgan around so Morgan gave Demonia space until she was ready to accept who she was. Morgan is also worried about Demonia’s goals in life and hopes to find the other scouts so that she can tell them and explain why Demonia is the way she is, she hopes the other scouts will pull her out of the dark place that she is in and show her that there is a group of people that will be her friends and will stand up and beside her and never judge her.
Explanation
I choose Hades because I have always loved the underworld in Greek myth and I felt sorry that no one respected Hades even though he was the oldest sibling when it came to him, Zeus, and Poseidon and the first born of Cronus and Rhea (this is what I was taught in school just an fyi in case someone was told or taught differently.) I feel that people hated him for being the god of the dead. I can relate to Hades in the way or the youngest sibling getting everything that he wanted and the eldest not given any respect or appreciation.
Writing Sample
“So Morgan these other scouts that you have been telling me about, do you know where any of them are?” Demonia was walking through the park near her house.
“Demonia if I did I would tell you but I have been following you since your birth so I have not even thought about looking for the others but I guess I could start now that you are awakened, if I leave are you sure you won’t need me?” Morgan always worried about Demonia being along.
Demonia smiled “Just please try to find them for me.”
Morgan flew off to find the others and worried about Demonia’s future as a scout.
As Morgan searched Demonia went to a national park to take photos and enjoy her some quiet time to herself, she climbed several trees to get the best photos and stood on the edge of cliffs to get the right light, as she was starting to leave three men came off of a trail and smiled as they saw her. She saw the look in their eyes and it was the look of an animal that wanted to mate, she returned their smiles but it was darker and more sinister. Demonia fought them off and even kicked one hard enough to send him off a cliff and the other two had fallen to the ground coughing and gasping for air.
Demonia walked out of the park feeling proud that she had made them as they would have made her suffer. She always felt alive when she used her abilities to hurt others, she couldn’t help herself when she thinks about the people that she has hurt she wonders what would have happened if had been someone else who couldn’t defend themselves. Morgan met with Demonia on the roof of where she lives and they talked to each other about their day even though Morgan has to pry to get it out of Demonia what she had done while she had been searching.
“You aren’t supposed to use your abilities for reason like that, not on normal people!” Morgan was flying around Demonia furiously.
“Yea well they were bad people and I had to do something so I gave them a good scare.” Keeping her head covered so that she doesn’t get pecked at. Once Demonia was done being scolded she went inside, took a shower, made dinner for herself, fed Morgan then went to bed.
Name: Demonia Drakevolare (last name is the combination of the greek word for dragon latin words for fly)
Meaning: female demon of the dragonflies
Age: 22
Birthdate: October 31st
School/Occupation: Freelance Scenery Photographer
Major NPCs: Her mother and father are hardly around and most people make fun of her, she has yet to make any friends.
History
She was born in Greece on October 31st and a full moon was shining brightly into the hospital room, most people in the hospital were superstitious and said that everything lined up to perfectly and that she would be a curse upon anyone around her. From a young age her appearance made her different, her lavender eye scared other children and her long black ravened hair always got pulled on, she had so many problems with other children that she was home schooled and she never left her house. When she was ten her parents and her moved to America into a city that she was told is called New York.
Nothing much had happened in her first year of living there, she lives in what is Upper East Side of New York. Her parents took up a traveling job and so that they wouldn’t have to take her everywhere with them they hired a nanny to take care of her when they were gone, the nanny was never kind to her, she was always called a freak and forced to wear contacts so that the nanny didn’t get creeped out by the lavender color of her eyes, she cried to her parents every time they came home to try to find a new nanny for her but they never listened. She started to look into private schools that she could enroll in so that she could get out of the house, while researching schools she found Drake Preparatory School and the next time she saw her parents she convinced them to enroll her.
She enjoyed school more than home, the teasing of other kids didn’t bother her anymore since she was engrossed into her school work, she was most happy for it since she would no longer have to wear contacts and she didn’t mind the uniforms too much, when she was fifteen some of the boys started to pull on her hair and call her names, this was the first time in a long time that she was really getting teased. Her anger started to grow and as it did a power swept over her and the boys fell to the ground in pain, a crow had swooped down and landed on her shoulder and started to talk to her, she had become so upset that she had ran off of school property and took a bus and walked the rest of the way to the nearest forest, when she looked around the crow perched on her shoulder again and told Demonia that she was Sailor Hades the guardian of death, the crow introduced herself as Morgan her partner that is to train her on how to be a sailor guardian, Demonia slowly excepted this fact but she also learned that there were other like her and she loved the idea of causing them all misery and suffering once she finds them and knows who they are.
Demonia graduated with all A’s and even though she had many scholarships to colleges that would have taken her in and allow her to stay in the dorms she turned them all down except one that was to School of Visual Arts. There she learned about photography and was really good at capturing the beauty in nature even if to other the photos that she took were morbid and depressing, her teachers always loved her photos and when she was praised for how good they were it always brought a smile to her face, when she graduated she had A’s and B’s but it didn’t bother her, her choice of college course made her feel alive and happy for once in her life.
Demonia now spends most her time outdoors trying to find places that she hadn’t taken photos of yet and trying to get the right light for her picture perfect moment, she isn’t bothered by how little her parents are home and she finally has a friend named Morgan, a pet crow that she talks to whenever she is out and about and Morgan always listens and talks back if she has something to say on the matter that they are discussing.
Personality
She is very much to herself and doesn’t know how to interact with others since she has never had a friend that she could talk to, deep down she is nice and kind but the years of loneliness had made her wary and cautious of everyone around her. Quirk - She has and elegant air to her but instead of looking as though she thinks she is better than everyone around her she looks as though she is being herself and not fake or standoffish, if you ever run into her on the streets you might see her giving to the homeless, they seem to be the only people that will accept her, she gives them food, clothing, and money whenever she isn’t busy.
Her motivation is to find the other scouts and cause them pain if she can and find her place in the world but she is also motivated by the idea that maybe one day she will have friends that she can protect and that will protect her.
In her free time she likes to take scenery photos and then sell them, she writes poetry and goes to a lot of the jazz clubs, she goes to the poets corner when they have open mic night and she pick a poem that she had been working on and tells anyone that will listen. In her future she would like to find a guy who will accept her for how she looks and her personality, she wants to settle down with him and start a family.
She dislikes bright lively colors since the people who normally wear them are or seem to be happy, she hates people who seem to be fakes and cares for no one but themselves even when it is family matter related, she loves to go the harbor and ride the ferry and take photos of the city while out on the water. She loves winter, she takes all her best photos during that time and she goes loves to go ice skating in the park, her best memory happened there, she was dancing alone on the ice and a young man asked if he could join her, they danced to the music that was playing and he told her that she had beautiful eyes and her hair reminded him of a flock of ravens. She never saw the man again unless it is in her dreams where her world is her own.
Appearance
What does your character look like? Raven black Hair, lavender eyes, she has a smooth unblemished face with pale pink lips and a small beauty mark next to her nose on the left side of her face, she is 5’6”, 125 pounds, she has a curvaceous body, her most distinguishing features are her eyes and hair and her porcelain looking skin; also on her right shoulder blade she has a birth mark in the shape of a two pronged spear (popular symbol of hades), and she prefers to wear dresses and skirts she loves to wear anything that will make her look elegant.
Transformation
“I call forth the deadly and powerful Hades of the Underworld.” As she starts to go through her transformation a funnel of dark and tortured souls would surround has they rip her clothing away and form a short, black tunic onto her and as it ends there would be a form standing behind her in all black robes and then vanishes soon after. Her relic would be a black shroud.
Powers
Her weapon is her relic that is a black shroud, if she has the chance the wrap it around someone just once then it will slowly encase the victim and constrict them until they either die or Demonia pulls it off of them. Her power ability is to summon the souls of the dead to attack anyone she wants.
Guardian
Morgan (Celtic goddess name, if this does not work then I will choose another. I just liked the name Morgan so I used it) is Demonia’s guardian and only friend; she is a raven that has always been there for Demonia even if she doesn’t know it. Morgan looks just like any other raven but the seemingly gold ring on her head as if she was wearing a tiara of some sort was the only thing that was different about her. Morgan is a caring and loving guardian, when she first came to Demonia’s aid and told Demonia who she was Demonia would start to freak out whenever she saw Morgan around so Morgan gave Demonia space until she was ready to accept who she was. Morgan is also worried about Demonia’s goals in life and hopes to find the other scouts so that she can tell them and explain why Demonia is the way she is, she hopes the other scouts will pull her out of the dark place that she is in and show her that there is a group of people that will be her friends and will stand up and beside her and never judge her.
Explanation
I choose Hades because I have always loved the underworld in Greek myth and I felt sorry that no one respected Hades even though he was the oldest sibling when it came to him, Zeus, and Poseidon and the first born of Cronus and Rhea (this is what I was taught in school just an fyi in case someone was told or taught differently.) I feel that people hated him for being the god of the dead. I can relate to Hades in the way or the youngest sibling getting everything that he wanted and the eldest not given any respect or appreciation.
Writing Sample
“So Morgan these other scouts that you have been telling me about, do you know where any of them are?” Demonia was walking through the park near her house.
“Demonia if I did I would tell you but I have been following you since your birth so I have not even thought about looking for the others but I guess I could start now that you are awakened, if I leave are you sure you won’t need me?” Morgan always worried about Demonia being along.
Demonia smiled “Just please try to find them for me.”
Morgan flew off to find the others and worried about Demonia’s future as a scout.
As Morgan searched Demonia went to a national park to take photos and enjoy her some quiet time to herself, she climbed several trees to get the best photos and stood on the edge of cliffs to get the right light, as she was starting to leave three men came off of a trail and smiled as they saw her. She saw the look in their eyes and it was the look of an animal that wanted to mate, she returned their smiles but it was darker and more sinister. Demonia fought them off and even kicked one hard enough to send him off a cliff and the other two had fallen to the ground coughing and gasping for air.
Demonia walked out of the park feeling proud that she had made them as they would have made her suffer. She always felt alive when she used her abilities to hurt others, she couldn’t help herself when she thinks about the people that she has hurt she wonders what would have happened if had been someone else who couldn’t defend themselves. Morgan met with Demonia on the roof of where she lives and they talked to each other about their day even though Morgan has to pry to get it out of Demonia what she had done while she had been searching.
“You aren’t supposed to use your abilities for reason like that, not on normal people!” Morgan was flying around Demonia furiously.
“Yea well they were bad people and I had to do something so I gave them a good scare.” Keeping her head covered so that she doesn’t get pecked at. Once Demonia was done being scolded she went inside, took a shower, made dinner for herself, fed Morgan then went to bed.
Results
I honestly wouldn't have guessed this was your first time doing an application, you wrote it quite well! There are some issues that prevent your character from being accepted into the game at present, but if you revise, I think you stand a strong chance of being accepted on the next attempt.
The verdict is Reject for Revision. Required revisions (the elements that prevented an accept with revision verdict) are indicated with an asterisk.
Character Info
* Surname: "Volare" is actually Latin for the verb "to fly" -- the insect/noun is "musca." I would suggest looking for a real surname with a meaning that suits your purposes rather than inventing one. If you do want to use an invented surname, consider making it reminiscent of a real surname, and avoid mixing words from different languages.
History
- Why did her parents name her Demonia?
- Apparently they don't celebrate Halloween in Greece, so I'm not sure if October 31st would have given the locals cause for superstition. You might consider a Tuesday the 13th (the Greek equivalent of Friday the 13th) or, if you want to keep the date, losing the superstition surrounding her birth.
- Please add some more information about her parents. What do they do for a living, what prompted them to move to America? From details of the history, it seems like they are financially well-off, but it's not explicitly stated. What is their relationship with their daughter? Who was responsible for her home schooling?
- Lavender eyes seem such a minor physical abnormality to inspire such vitriolic response from everyone she encounters. If you want to retain this theme in her history, I would suggest a more pronounced abnormality or deformity.
- How old was she when she started at Drake Prep?
- What prompted the boys to start teasing her?
- There aren't any forests easily accessible by bus around NYC; it takes about an hour by car to reach any real forest. (My guess is it would probably take at least two hours to travel that far by bus, but I can't say for sure.) The Ramble in Central Park might be a workable alternative?
- The game has only just started; seven years might be a bit too long ago for a guardian to have appeared. I would suggest a year, maybe two. Please also outline what she and her guardian have done about her senshi identity if you want to go this route.
- Where does she live currently?
Personality
- There are so many good people in the world, I'm not sure about saying the only people who accept her are the homeless. Being intensely introverted and uninviting towards others could be reasonable cause for lack of friends, but universal shunning seems a bit too unlikely.
- How is she, behaviorally? Awkward, serious? There's a lot of description here of things she does, but I'm more interested to know who she is as a person.
Appearance
- I'd suggest describing her features a little bit more: are any of her features particularly big or small, what shape is her face?
- Hairstyle: How long is her hair? How does she wear it?
* Fuku
- Description: An image can serve as a visual aid to accompany written description (making describing your fuku much easier) but you do still need to write some form of description for this section. :)
- Design: The included image definitely fulfills the Grecian requirement, but you've gone too far away from the sailor fuku aspect. Please incorporate more senshi aspects into the design. I would suggest adding some form of tiara, perhaps a gem decoration in front, and some adornment on her arms. You might also consider incorporating elements which reference the classic bodysuit, bows, and/or sailor top.
* Powers
- I think the shroud is a good choice for a weapon -- it's unexpected and could be highly effective in combat situations in the way that a net was employed by gladiators -- but you cannot give a senshi a direct killing power.
- Please describe her soul-summoning power. How does she perform it? What does it look like? What are its effects on other senshi?
* Guardian
- Theos guardians need to be based on people found in Greek myth. Please visit the Theos information page for specifics.
Writing Sample
* You've done a little too much in this sample; please provide story snippet that covers a small amount of time in detail rather than skimming over a large period of time.
The verdict is Reject for Revision. Required revisions (the elements that prevented an accept with revision verdict) are indicated with an asterisk.
Character Info
* Surname: "Volare" is actually Latin for the verb "to fly" -- the insect/noun is "musca." I would suggest looking for a real surname with a meaning that suits your purposes rather than inventing one. If you do want to use an invented surname, consider making it reminiscent of a real surname, and avoid mixing words from different languages.
History
- Why did her parents name her Demonia?
- Apparently they don't celebrate Halloween in Greece, so I'm not sure if October 31st would have given the locals cause for superstition. You might consider a Tuesday the 13th (the Greek equivalent of Friday the 13th) or, if you want to keep the date, losing the superstition surrounding her birth.
- Please add some more information about her parents. What do they do for a living, what prompted them to move to America? From details of the history, it seems like they are financially well-off, but it's not explicitly stated. What is their relationship with their daughter? Who was responsible for her home schooling?
- Lavender eyes seem such a minor physical abnormality to inspire such vitriolic response from everyone she encounters. If you want to retain this theme in her history, I would suggest a more pronounced abnormality or deformity.
- How old was she when she started at Drake Prep?
- What prompted the boys to start teasing her?
- There aren't any forests easily accessible by bus around NYC; it takes about an hour by car to reach any real forest. (My guess is it would probably take at least two hours to travel that far by bus, but I can't say for sure.) The Ramble in Central Park might be a workable alternative?
- The game has only just started; seven years might be a bit too long ago for a guardian to have appeared. I would suggest a year, maybe two. Please also outline what she and her guardian have done about her senshi identity if you want to go this route.
- Where does she live currently?
Personality
- There are so many good people in the world, I'm not sure about saying the only people who accept her are the homeless. Being intensely introverted and uninviting towards others could be reasonable cause for lack of friends, but universal shunning seems a bit too unlikely.
- How is she, behaviorally? Awkward, serious? There's a lot of description here of things she does, but I'm more interested to know who she is as a person.
Appearance
- I'd suggest describing her features a little bit more: are any of her features particularly big or small, what shape is her face?
- Hairstyle: How long is her hair? How does she wear it?
* Fuku
- Description: An image can serve as a visual aid to accompany written description (making describing your fuku much easier) but you do still need to write some form of description for this section. :)
- Design: The included image definitely fulfills the Grecian requirement, but you've gone too far away from the sailor fuku aspect. Please incorporate more senshi aspects into the design. I would suggest adding some form of tiara, perhaps a gem decoration in front, and some adornment on her arms. You might also consider incorporating elements which reference the classic bodysuit, bows, and/or sailor top.
* Powers
- I think the shroud is a good choice for a weapon -- it's unexpected and could be highly effective in combat situations in the way that a net was employed by gladiators -- but you cannot give a senshi a direct killing power.
- Please describe her soul-summoning power. How does she perform it? What does it look like? What are its effects on other senshi?
* Guardian
- Theos guardians need to be based on people found in Greek myth. Please visit the Theos information page for specifics.
Writing Sample
* You've done a little too much in this sample; please provide story snippet that covers a small amount of time in detail rather than skimming over a large period of time.